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Henny Youngman
Birthday:
16 March 1906
Birth Name:
Henry Youngman
Height:
191 cm
Biography
[on seafood restaurants] The catch of the day was hepatitis.
[on seafood restaurants] The catch of the day was hepatitis.
While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
My dad was the town drunk. Usually that's not so bad, but New York City?
My dad was the town drunk. Usually that's not so bad, but New York City?
I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.
I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.
You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put 'page 2.'
How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put 'page 2.'
I once wanted to become an atheist but I gave up. They have no holidays.
I once wanted to become an atheist but I gave up. They have no holidays.
I was so ugly when I was born that the doctor slapped my mother.
I was so ugly when I was born that the doctor slapped my mother.
I miss my wife's cooking - as often as I can.
I miss my wife's cooking - as often as I can.
My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
I've been married for 34 years, and I'm still in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me.
I've been married for 34 years, and I'm still in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me.
I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
Take my wife ... please!
Take my wife ... please!
Henny Youngman
A career of seven decades of snappy, irreverent one-liners put Henry "Henny" Youngman at the top of most comedians' list of favorite showmen. Born in London, England, and moving to the United States when he was a baby, Youngman started his professional career as a printer in a small store. Naturally funny, he moonlighted in show business as the leader of a band called the "Swanee Syncopaters." One night, the regular comedian didn't show up, and Youngman, who had tickled crowds with his jokes between musical sets, was asked to fill in. Some time later, established comedian Milton Berle stumbled upon Youngman's store and saw his "Comedy Cards," a series of one-line gags that he had printed and were sold in his store. Berle liked what he read, and a lifelong friendship developed. Youngman, despite all the jokes about his wife, had a happy marriage that only ended when Sadie died in 1987. She supported him for years during the lean times, and he was always quick to let others know of his gratitude and devotion to her. Youngman's big break came when he was booked on the popular Kate Smith radio show in 1937. Never really making it in films, his nightclub career soared. His trademark, rapid-fire one-liners, with violin in hand, put him in a league of his own. In the 1960s, he enjoyed renewed popularity after appearances on the hip Laugh-In (1967). Youngman wrote a number of books comprised of his short jokes. The comedic legend died in 1998 at the age of 92 of complications from the flu.
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