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Will Rogers
Birthday:
November 4
Birth Name:
William Penn Adair Rogers
Height:
180 cm
Biography
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven.
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven.
Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
[on introducing comic banter to his rope-twirling routines] The first gag I ever pulled was when I got my rope all tangled up and says, 'A rope ain't bad to get tangled up in if it ain't around your neck'.
[on introducing comic banter to his rope-twirling routines] The first gag I ever pulled was when I got my rope all tangled up and says, 'A rope ain't bad to get tangled up in if it ain't around your neck'.
The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
Most people and actors appearing on the stage have some writer write their material. I don't do that. Congress is good enough for me. They have been writing my material for years.
Most people and actors appearing on the stage have some writer write their material. I don't do that. Congress is good enough for me. They have been writing my material for years.
[on Commitee] Outside of traffic, there is nothing that has held this country back as much as committees.
[on Commitee] Outside of traffic, there is nothing that has held this country back as much as committees.
[on looking over the Academy Awards audience, 1934]: This looks like the last roundup of the ermine.
[on looking over the Academy Awards audience, 1934]: This looks like the last roundup of the ermine.
You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
I don't care how poor and inefficient a little country is; they like to run their own business. I know men that would make my wife a better husband than I am, but, darn it, I'm not going to give her to 'em.
I don't care how poor and inefficient a little country is; they like to run their own business. I know men that would make my wife a better husband than I am, but, darn it, I'm not going to give her to 'em.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Liberty don't work as good in practice as it does in speeches.
Liberty don't work as good in practice as it does in speeches.
The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How's the President?"
The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How's the President?"
Nothing you can't spell will ever work.
Nothing you can't spell will ever work.
We can't all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.
We can't all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure it was drawn up by a lawyer.
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure it was drawn up by a lawyer.
I can remember way back when a liberal was one who was generous with his own money.
I can remember way back when a liberal was one who was generous with his own money.
If we ever pass out as a great nation we ought to put on our tombstone, 'America died from a delusion that she has moral leadership.'
If we ever pass out as a great nation we ought to put on our tombstone, 'America died from a delusion that she has moral leadership.'
People's minds are changed through observation and not through argument.
People's minds are changed through observation and not through argument.
There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.
Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.
Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.
Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.
My father was one eighth Cherokee and my mother one fourth Cherokee, which I figure makes me about an eight cigar-store Injun.
My father was one eighth Cherokee and my mother one fourth Cherokee, which I figure makes me about an eight cigar-store Injun.
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
When you put down the good things you ought to have done and leave out the bad things you did do -- that's Memoirs.
When you put down the good things you ought to have done and leave out the bad things you did do -- that's Memoirs.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!
And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago.
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago.
Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.
Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, it raised the I.Q. of both states.
When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, it raised the I.Q. of both states.
Broad-minded is just another way of saying a fellow is too lazy to form an opinion.
Broad-minded is just another way of saying a fellow is too lazy to form an opinion.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works.
There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works.
I never met a man I didn't like.
I never met a man I didn't like.
[last words, in a radio broadcast by Rogers before the plane crash in which he and Wiley Post were killed] Well, Wiley's got her warmed up. Let's go.
[last words, in a radio broadcast by Rogers before the plane crash in which he and Wiley Post were killed] Well, Wiley's got her warmed up. Let's go.
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
My ancestors may not have come over on the Mayflower, but they met 'em at the boat.
My ancestors may not have come over on the Mayflower, but they met 'em at the boat.
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it . . . You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it . . . You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on Earth.
Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on Earth.
No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has.
No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has.
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.
There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.
There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
Will Rogers
World-famous, widely popular American humorist of the vaudeville stage and of silent and sound films, Will Rogers graduated from military school, but his first real job was in the livestock business in Argentina, of all places. He transported pack animals across the South Atlantic from Buenos Aires to South Africa for use in the Boer War (1899-1902). He stayed in Johannesburg for a short while, appearing there in Wild West shows where he drew upon his expertise with horse and lasso. Returning to America, he brought his talents to vaudeville and by 1917 was a Ziegfeld Follies star. Over the years he gradually blended into his act his unique style of topical, iconoclastic humor, in which he speared the efforts of the powerful to trample the rights of the common man, while twirling his lariat and perhaps chewing on a blade of straw. Although appearing in many silents, he reached his motion-picture zenith with the arrival of sound. Now mass audiences could hear his rural twang as he delivered his homespun philosophy on behalf of Everyman. The appeal and weight of his words carried such weight with the average citizen that he was even nominated for governor of Oklahoma (which he declined).
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