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Hugh Dennis : [If this is the answer, what is the question: Up To 18 Months]  How long does it take Abu Hamza to tie his shoelace?
Hugh Dennis : [If this is the answer, what is the question: Up To 18 Months]  How long does it take Abu Hamza to tie his shoelace?
[repeated line]  Hugh Dennis : Are you paying too much for your car insurance?
[repeated line]  Hugh Dennis : Are you paying too much for your car insurance?
Hugh Dennis : [Unlikely things to be said during a programme indent]  If you were affected by any of the issues raised in tonight's episode of Balamory...
Hugh Dennis : [Unlikely things to be said during a programme indent]  If you were affected by any of the issues raised in tonight's episode of Balamory...
Hugh Dennis : [Unlikely things to be said in programme indents]  You may be interested to know that I'm completely naked and playing with myself.
Hugh Dennis : [Unlikely things to be said in programme indents]  You may be interested to know that I'm completely naked and playing with myself.
Hugh Dennis : Tired of a messy toolbox? Then you need the Abu Hamza multi-tool!
Hugh Dennis : Tired of a messy toolbox? Then you need the Abu Hamza multi-tool!
Hugh Dennis : [the panel are asked what to do about bird flu. Hugh is a Tory MP; Rory is the Duke of Edinburgh]  Well, personally I think we ought to do away with all birds, including swans. Team Captain : They belong to my wife, you bastard! Hugh Dennis : Oh, yeah. I've shagged your wife, as well. Team Captain : You lucky devil! I haven't had sex with her f...
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Hugh Dennis : [the panel are asked what to do about bird flu. Hugh is a Tory MP; Rory is the Duke of Edinburgh]  Well, personally I think we ought to do away with all birds, including swans. Team Captain : They belong to my wife, you bastard! Hugh Dennis : Oh, yeah. I've shagged your wife, as well. Team Captain : You lucky devil! I haven't had sex with her for nearly sixty years!
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Team Captain : [Rory is Tony Blair giving a speech; Hugh is translating]  As Prime Minister, it is my duty to protect the people of this nation. Hugh Dennis : Whoops! Team Captain : Many nights I've lain awake, gazing into the abyss... Hugh Dennis : I wish Cherie would sleep with her mouth closed. Team Captain : I know that a lot of people have been wonderin...
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Team Captain : [Rory is Tony Blair giving a speech; Hugh is translating]  As Prime Minister, it is my duty to protect the people of this nation. Hugh Dennis : Whoops! Team Captain : Many nights I've lain awake, gazing into the abyss... Hugh Dennis : I wish Cherie would sleep with her mouth closed. Team Captain : I know that a lot of people have been wondering when I'm going to retire... Hugh Dennis : I know Gordon has been wondering when I'm going to retire... Team Captain : I'm sure that one day, Gordon will make a great leader... Hugh Dennis : ...of the Opposition... Team Captain : But I'm not a king-maker. There will be a proper procedure for deciding the leader who follows me. Hugh Dennis : Whomsoever pulls the sword from the stone! He shall be the one!
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Hugh Dennis : Itchy skin, dry flaking scalp? You disgust me!
Hugh Dennis : Itchy skin, dry flaking scalp? You disgust me!
Hugh Dennis : [In scenes we'd like to see: what a television announcer is unlikely to say]  If you've been affected by the issues raised in Balamory...
Hugh Dennis : [In scenes we'd like to see: what a television announcer is unlikely to say]  If you've been affected by the issues raised in Balamory...
[repeated line]  Hugh Dennis : The band was Showaddywaddy!
[repeated line]  Hugh Dennis : The band was Showaddywaddy!
Hugh Dennis : Viewers of a nervous disposition may be interested to know that your television is off and I am speaking to you from inside your head...
Hugh Dennis : Viewers of a nervous disposition may be interested to know that your television is off and I am speaking to you from inside your head...
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Mock the Week - Season 17

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