Simon : You... actually, uh, I did want to talk to you guys about something. Emily : What is it? Simon : [stammering]  Uh, well... Jack : Let me guess. You got somebody pregnant. No, you're pregnant. Simon : Yeah. Jack : I knew it! Simon : Yeah, I'm pregnant. Jack : I knew it. I mean, he's got that glow about him, babe. Simon : No, um... [struggles to get the words out]  Simon : I'm gay. [Emily and Jack are both quiet]  Emily : Honey... Simon : And I don't want you guys to think anything different. I'm still me... Emily : Of course you are, Simon. Jack : Yeah. So you're gay. Which one of your old girlfriends turned you? Was it the one with the big eyebrow or... Emily : Jack. Nora : Jesus Christ, dad, do you ever shut the hell up? Jack : I'm kidding. Nora : It's not funny! Jack : I'm kidding. Hey, Nora, open up your gift, please? [an embarrassed Jack exits the living room]